Friday, August 10, 2012

new updates

Alot has been going on lately here! I haven't had much time to update the blog! 
Between trying to keep my house clean, keeping up with Alexei and having a busy summer i'm afraid the blog doesnt fit in there :)

so here is an update!
Nick and i went to see the midnight showing of Batman The Dark Knight Rises in IMAX. it was awesome and also nice to have a date night alone. My little sister slept over so that Alexei could sleep in her own bed :) thanks so much Madi! 

We've seen the movie twice already and we're ready to go again!

 My mom has been back and forth between Kanab and home. My grandparents are trying to move from Kanab up to northern utah soon to be around all of their kids. They're house needed some updating so my mom and dad have been going down to help do tile, paint and try to update their house so it will sale. after Madi stayed the night while Nick and I went to batman she stayed with me one of the nights my parents were in Kanab. We had such a good time. We watched Footloose and ate lots of treats and then the next day we went shopping at city creek! 

For Marks birthday he had a Super hero/disney party! we had alot of fun!
We ate pizza and introduced our costumes, had a dance competition, played night games and stayed up way too late!

The next day was super hot outside so we decided to do some Slip N Slide Kickball! it was so fun to watch all of the kids and Nick and Mark have so much fun playing. 

The kids had so much fun playing all day so nick and i decided we would let them come to our house to have another sleep over! they we're having so much fun... 

The kids loved getting all of nicks light sabers out and playing with them. i am asked by Kache (liz's youngest) "when are we gonna play with the life sabers again?" every time i see him :) 

We went to McDonalds at 1am so we had some food to eat while we watched super man. Each kid got something off of the dollar menu and we got some fries to share. :)

we have so much fun with the nieces and nephews on the Van Komen side. 

Alexei has had quite the personality lately. She loves to watch Finding Nemo and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and play in the front room. Her favorite part of the day is when she gets to go outside and play hockey with dad. She loves walking down the ramp in our garage and walking straight to the hockey sticks. She's got a mind of her own! she hardly ever wants you to hold her! Shes starting to talk, She says "Mama" "Dada" (depending on if shes tired some times it (Dee Dee) "BaBa" "toodles" "hotdog" and a couple of other things :) 

If you are over alot you'll know that Alexei LOVES to climb and hang on things. She is such a busy body. 

Alexei loves to do forward rolls and balance on her toys. After about a month of this happening we decided we should put her in Gymnastics.

We enrolled Alexei in a Parent-Tot gymnastics class at Black Diamond Gym in Daybreak. Its quite a far drive but i wasnt too pleased with the gym in north ogden so i figured it would be a drive no matter what gym we put her in. My Aunt works at Black Diamond and she was so excited that Alexei was coming there.
Alexei loves the foam pits. Nick gets in them with her and throws her up and she lands in the pits. she loves it. she also loves to slide off of the mats into the pits.

Anywhere we are that has a trampoline alexei is constantly wanting to be on it. She loved having Nick bounce her and shes learning the concept to bounce herself.

Lex loves hanging on the bar. she thought it was so cool.
At the end of class the teacher does bubbles and stamp time. Alexei LOVES chasing after the bubbles and she loves getting stamps on her feet. (probably cause momma never lets her draw or stamp on herself :))

Lex loves the tubes and the obsticle courses set up along the way 
My little climber haha 

Alexei and i had the opportunity to go camping together. Nick had to work (BOO) but we had fun anyways. 

Alexei loves helping me. She has such a special little spirit. She is only 16 months and she's such a good little helper. 


Alexei did really well with the drive down. we only stopped once to change her diaper! 

Alexei and Brekin swinging with Hailey and Ryan 

Alexei has found her love for salt and vinegar pringles (just like her momma)

Lex loves this chair. she loved all the outdoors time we had wile we were camping

This is the grandmas swinging their grand kids :) 

We're trying out the toddler bed. Lex loves the fact that her bedding is minnie but she is still a bit unsure about the whole thing.

The first round of the summer league play offs was last night. The boys killed it 8-1. Nick should have gotten a shut out but theres always those floater goals that like to find their way in!

The championship game is monday so we'll see how they do! Good luck!

Well thats all for now. im sure you'll get another update in the next few months ;)

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Late night thinking... It's good to grieve....right?

I can't help but document how I'm feeling. Only for the fact that I need to let this out. Grieving is good right.....? I hope so. I can only grieve so much to nick without feeling like I annoy him. With that being said-if you get sick of reading this, be my guest and move on to something more exciting to read :)

With that being said- I'm hurting inside tonight. Recently I have thought about entering my sweet little Alexei into some little girl beauty pageants (I will never be like the moms on toddlers and tiaras... Gag me) but just simple pageants. And as weird as this sounds - I'm upset because I can't walk across the stage with Alexei and be the one there for her. I get a lot of stares being a mom in a wheelchair (you wouldn't believe how many I get) I get so many questions about if I can take care of Lexei.... Yes I do say "nick help me with this" , "nick! Alexei crawled up the stairs! I can't reach her!" "nick do this" "nick do that"...... Sounds bossy.... Right? But I want all you able bodied mothers out there to remember how great you have it, as hard as life is it can always get worse, even for me.

I remember the day after my accident waking up to my doctor and mother talking about my condition. If I could have kids, sensation, the ability of still having a "normal" life. And as he stood there and told my mom that I have absolutely zero chance of walking again.... As weird as it sounds-I was at peace. I knew everything would be fine. I LOVED to cheer and dance and tumble. But I wasn't as devastated
as you would think I was. In the hospital I didn't grieve much. I was focused on getting back the movement I have and getting on with my life. And that I did. There's been a night here and there where I lay in bed with tears rolling down my face because I wish with all my heart I could walk. But after 5 minutes of that I think "Autumn he your act together and do something productive instead of laying here feeling sorry for yourself".....

I wish with all my heart I could chase Alexei when she tries to run away and get into things. I wish I could take her on the big toy at the Park. I wish I could walk across the stage at the pageants I'm entering her in. I wish that I could take her to a mommy and me dance class. THIS Is why I wish I could walk. Not for myself, for Alexei.

I'm not one to let my emotions flow like this but I can't help but let all of this out. And what better of a place to do it than my blog and personal journal right?

Right now all I can do is pray for a cure to spinal cord injuries, keep my chin up and take things day by day. I hope as Alexei grows things get easier for me to mentally handle. I hope she understands that it's not because I don't want to do these things, I just physically can't.

I hope I hope I hope.
I'm so thankful that I have such a darling little girl that loves me for the person I am, not my physical appearance.

I love my little Alexei.

Thanks for letting me vent and get some tears out blogger friends :)

Saturday, May 26, 2012


We went to California May 19-24th! 
It was such a blast! We rented a house with a bunch of our friends!

We'll be headed back soon, im sure!

 Eating dinner at the Cheese cake factory. The kings were playing and every time they scored the boys waved their towels and cheered!
 Alexei and i at the cheesecake factory
 Riding the Tower of Terror with Nick and Mark!

 We met up with The Gazleys while we were there! the girls loved spending time together!
 Just chillin' at our house.
 Cheesecake factory!
 Alexei meeting Minnie mouse! she loved it! i loved watching her wave at minnie while we were waiting in line! she was so happy to see Minnie!
 Dinner at the cheesecake factory. Lots of Great laughs
 Season pass holders, once again!
 Space Mountain with Mark and Julie!
 Very last ride on space mountain!
 Cheesecake factory
 i love this squishy face
 Captain EO!
 Alexei and her favorite Uncle Choi :)
 Alexei and Paisley had way too much fun making messes together! :)
 Walking around in circles! She laughed and thought it was so much fun!
 Alexei and Brekin
 Eating before our flight left to come home
 a bugs life! lex and daddy!
 Mark and his date to club 33 :)
 Flying to California!
 My cute little family! wouldnt trade it for anything!
 Meeting Minnie!
 All of us with Minnie and Mickey
 Flying home!
 Monica and I jumping or more Falling into the pool at our house! haha 
Space mountain! so much fun! 

 i cant wait to go back! we didnt want to come home!